Got a[n L.E.D.] light?

Electronic cigarettes are here. Well, they were here in 2004, but now they're readily available.

Since I have Obama coming out of every pore, it's the first piece of real news I've found in weeks.

In concept, I applaud the idea, though I doubt it will catch on in the U.S. It's a device that looks just like a cigarette, but has a mini spray-pump inside it that blasts a small amount of nicotine directly into your lungs, and some 'vapor' is released to simulate smoke. There's no 'actual' smoke. They are making cigar versions of the idea too.

Good news! Smokers can continue to kill themselves uninterrupted, without taking the rest of us with them.


The reasoning behind it is that you now won't have to inhale all the carcinogenic chemicals you normally get from burning tobacco. Just the tasty nicotine for the high. To add to the effect, there's a little red battery-powered light at the tip that is activated when you inhale. So it still looks like a lit cigarette to other people.

Or to you, if you like to smoke in front of a mirror.

If this thing takes off, it's good news for all of us second-hand smokers. I dream of the day I can walk down the sidewalk without breathing in the smoke from a dipshit in front of me who lights up.

It's good news for companies too, whose employees take advantage of those hard-earned 'smoker's rights' and cut down on productivity by abusing the 'cigarette break'. Now you can just smoke in your office!

And it's good news for people who don't like to die in fires. Fires started by lit cigarettes account for about 1,000 deaths every year in the U.S. alone. And about 250 of them are not even smokers.

But the real question is, what are all these people going to do after sex?