Enough spitting on Mark Spitz

We get it. Michael Phelps is the greatest swimmer alive.

I'll tell you what's been bothering me way more than the constant barrage of Phelps in our face. If I read one more story written by another cocky sportswriter who shits (shitz? heh) on Mark Spitz, I'm going to scream.

Where's the respect? The guy not only won seven gold medals in a single Olympic games: he broke world records in all seven of them. Phelps only broke world records in six consecutive races, though he did hit another world record in his eighth. (his .01 second win over the Serbian in his seventh race didn't break a world record.) Now I'm reading all these articles about how everyone thinks Spitz is a crybaby because he wasn't invited to Beijing. Maybe I'm being a crybaby now. But we can thank the media and the newfangled Internet for turning this into a commercialized frenzy. Did you notice how little the cameras focused on Phelps' teammates? So, what do they actually look like? Weren't their families there too?

You know what? Mark Spitz should have been invited, and deep down in your heart, you know I'm right. It is a failure of humanity and the pinheads in the IOC for sweeping this champion under the carpet and forgetting about him.

Is this how we'll treat Michael Phelps when the next champion comes along in a few years?

Whatever you believe, in 1972, Mark Spitz was Michael Phelps. With all the ranting and raving and oohing and ahhing that goes along with it.

In fact, Spitz actually dominated Olympic swimming from a win percentage even more than Phelps. So if there's one person who's earned the right to put those medals around this kid's neck, at least the 8th one, it's Mark Spitz.

I hear people saying that Mark Spitz' time has come and gone. And how history is progressing just fine without him. That's bullshit. It certainly would not have progressed just fine without him. We can thank Mark Spitz for much of the hoopla. He's the one who set the bar so damn high. If it wasn't for Mark Spitz, no one would be making a big deal about eight gold medals in a single Olympiad, because no one else on the planet has even earned seven.

Fine, Michael Phelps is a nice guy, and Mark Spitz was kind of an asshole to his teammates. So is Barry Bonds. Who cares? Barry Bonds isn't paid to be friendly. Spitz was a shitty TV actor, too. Really? So is Keanu Reeves. What's your point? And as for comments contending that Phelps would have crushed Spitz in a race if they competed together, that's another dumbass comparison made by countless dickhead sportswriters trying to sell papers and get hits. Any athlete today would outdo his earlier counterpart, if only because of improved nutrition, training, and equipment. Frankly, I always thought that Mike Tyson would have killed Mohammad Ali in the ring at his age, but there was a time when grace and skill counted for more than ear-biting and rape. But what do I know?

All I'm sayin' is, it's a travesty that Spitz wasn't invited to Beijing to partake in something no one has done since him in four decades. A little bit of humility would have gone a long way. Maybe even 100 meters.